Q: How many women on MENOPAUSE does it take to change a light bulb?

Woman's Answer:

One! ONLY ONE!!!! And do you know WHY?



Because no one else in this house knows HOW to change a light bulb!


They don't even know that the bulb is BURNED OUT!! They would sit in the dark for THREE DAYS before they figured it out. And, once they figured it out, they wouldn't be able to find the stupid light bulbs despite the fact that they've been in the SAME CABINET for the past 17 YEARS! But if they did, by some miracle of God, actually find them, 2 DAYS LATER, the chair they dragged to stand on to change the STUPID light bulb would


STILL BE IN THE SAME SPOT!!!!! AND UNDERNEATH IT WOULD BE THE WRAPPER THE FREAKING LIGHT BULBS CAME IN!!!


BECAUSE NO ONE EVER PICKS UP OR CARRIES OUT THE GARBAGE!!!! IT'S A WONDER WE HAVEN'T ALL SUFFOCATED FROM THE PILES OF GARBAGE THAT ARE A FOOT DEEP THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE HOUSE!! IT WOULD TAKE AN ARMY TO CLEAN THIS PLACE!


AND DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON WHO CHANGES THE TOILET PAPER ROLL !!


I'm sorry. What was the question?

Gee, that's anytime!

Ut oh...

Too true, Donna.

Daniel

That takes menopause? Wow, I know a LOT of menopausal women...

Watch it, Justin, you don't want to make a menopausal woman upset.

Well he's still alive and hasn't been maimed or hurt so I don't think he knows as many menopausal women as he thinks he does.

pshhh

Sounds like my second night here at work. About 2230 I was not a happy individual.....patients lined up tapping their feet, nurses lined up tapping their feet, and the phone ringing off the hook. (I found out later from my supervisor that if the phone rings while I'm dealing with patients, I am to ignore it. Sure wish I'd known that before.)

Anyway, I was sitting here feeling "The Sergeant" rising to the surface, and trying real hard to suppress him. I was thinking, "I'm gonna lose it, I am gonna lose it and go off on somebody, I can feel it coming....don't do it, Sarge!"

I was talking with the ER registration clerk later, and she said, "Who's 'the Sergeant'?", and I said, "'The Sergeant' is a guy from my past. He was me, in fact. I was a sergeant in the Air Force for a number of years, and he is a screaming, foul-mouthed, brutal abusive bastard who cuts through all of the BS and clears the deck when the pressure gets too great. In short, 'The Sergeant' is an aspect of my personality that you do NOT want to encounter. 'The Sergeant' is not a nice person. 'The Sergeant' could get me fired."

She nodded and said, "I can understand that."

And I want to try really hard to make this job different from my last, where the idiocy I encountered every day was so overwhelming that "The Sergeant" got to the point where he predominated a good deal of the time. Not a good thing, not a good thing at all.

You can take the boy out of the service.....

well ... SOME men do suffer from PMS




post military service

Chuck Conners played The Sarge in Airplane!

Bad idea!

I'm having a hot flash right now and am frustrated getting things done. Very bad idea!



I also have to cook dinner!



Just found out my driver's license has expired. Gotta get it renewed tomorrow before I leave!



AND I'M HORMONAL!!!!!!!!!!!

Notice how all our problems usually start with "MEN"?

MENopause.

MENstruation.

Etc.

Women

Wols,
Army and Marines are always really entertained when Air Force and Navy talk about their sergeants and PO's (Petty Officers).

No, Daniel---that's "wymyn".



Yeah, I know. Until everybody goes out for a JAAFFU or a JANFU, and the Air Force and Navy have field kitchens with hot chow and tents with yukon stoves, and the Army and Marines are sleeping in the mud while it rains on them. Then it's the Air Force and Navy who do the laughing.

I've said it before, I'll say it again... PMS/Hormones are overrated.